“ Respect yourself sufficient to walk away from anything that no longer serves you, grows you, or even makes you happy. ” ~ Robert Tew
When you look at the above quote, who or what comes to mind for you? Is there someone or even something that immediately flows into your awareness? Perhaps someone or something you’ d rather not have to “ relate” to anymore but you always because you think you have to? If there’ s one thing that can significantly improve your life in short order, it’ s letting go of or walking away from relationships that you just don’ t really like anymore. When I say don’ t “ love” anymore, it doesn’ capital t necessarily refer to a romantic relationship, even though it could.
The point is just about everyone has a tendency to stay in relationships along with friends we no longer have something in common with, with relatives we have nothing in common with or perhaps don’ t even like, with co-workers or former co-workers who we don’ t really appreciate or even relate to anymore, a lover or even spouse that we’ re no longer in love with or no longer have something in common with, and the list continues on. If this sounds like what you’ re doing in a relationship of any sort that no longer serves you, causes you to grow, or doesn’ t cause you to happy, it’ s time to move out. And, it’ s perfectly alright to get out.
The things i especially like about the quote at the top of this article is “ Respect yourself enough to walk away. ” There are only two reasons we don’ t part ways with relationships that no longer serve our best passions: 1) we’ re not even aware walking away is a viable option, and 2) we feel obligated since we burden ourselves with sense of guilt. This means we are not trusting our intuition when we get nudges or even messages telling us it’ s time to leave the relationship behind, that individuals no longer love having this romantic relationship, and that to stand in our condition, we must respect ourselves enough to walk away from it.
You CAN walk away from any relationship, older or new, if it depletes your energy and no longer makes you happy. Actually you owe it to yourself to leave from these relationships because if you don’ t, you show a lack of regard for yourself and are in fact allowing them to reduce your energy and steal your pleasure. This will stand in the way of joy in other areas of your life as well.
There are gentle ways to walk away or even release these relationships. Here’ s an example. A while back I received a question in my Ask Peggy line of my newsletter from a person who was in this very position yet just didn’ t know what to carry out. She was aware she wished out of these particular relationships but couldn’ t bring herself to release them for fear of hurting feelings and also because of the guilt she was putting square on her own shoulders. Here’ s her question and our response. I think they’ re quite fitting for this article and may be of value to you if you’ re at a point in time where you want or even need to let go of any relationships. I’ ve included only the first letter of her first name here to protect her privacy.
“ Hi there Peggy. I don’ t possess much in common with my long-time friends anymore and don’ capital t enjoy spending as much time with them as I used to. My interests possess changed and so have I, and I enjoy doing different things with different people now. How do I let them know without insulting them or hurting their emotions?
“ Thanks for your question G. This comes up for a lot of people therefore it’ s more common than you might think. It’ s likely because you’ re experiencing personal growth as well as your likes and dislikes change as you do. I would suggest gently letting your friends know whenever they ask you to join them that you appreciate the offer but have other plans or just gently let them know that you don’ t enjoy whatever it is they’ ve invited you to do just as much as you used to.
You may even want to ask one or more of them to participate you in something new that you take pleasure in and see if they are interested in trying this out. This way you may develop a totally new friendship with the old friend or even friends based on new experiences they’ ve not yet had yet can be introduced to through you. This is also a good way to degree the playing field for the older and new and much less likely to cause hard feelings when much more the other of you chooses never to accept an invitation. I hope this really is helpful. – Peggy”
This is just one example of the many circumstances we all find ourselves in throughout our lifetimes where it’ s time to let a relationship of some kind go. In this instance, I also provided an option for recreating or reviving the relationship if it seemed to fit. Just remember to be kind to yourself and know that it’ s okay to let go, and it can be done gently and with respect for the other person or even persons’ feelings. Most importantly, however , remember to respect yourself enough to leave.